—You just said you loved it.
—Yeah. Because it’s shite.
—Ah, for fuck sake, listen. Nobody’s buyin’. The kids don’t think they have to.
—They download it for nothin’.
—Yeah, said Jimmy.—Exactly. My age group an’ a bit younger, we still buy. But they don’t buy much. An’ very little that’s new.
—Make a video.
—We’re goin’ to —
—A good one, said his da.—Make us laugh. Get your woman from the Rubberbandits video.
—You know the Rubberbandits?
—Of course I know the fuckin’ Rubberbandits.
The Rubberbandits were a pair of clever lads from Limerick who wore SuperValu bags over their heads, and rapped. Their song, ‘Horse Outside’, was the new national anthem. Jimmy hated them.
—More than eight million YouTube hits, said Jimmy.
—Twice as many as live in this poxy country, said his da.—It’s the way to go.
—But only about nine thousand bought the song, said Jimmy.
The misery in that statistic pleased him, all the noughts in the millions falling away – the state of the fuckin’ world.
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