Act One
Scene One
A small classroom in a Victorian school is furnished with tiny chairs and tables, a square of carpet, floor cushions, the usual creche teaching aids: beans in jars, a goldfish nature table, blackboard, wendy house, bricks, little library and jars of paint. On the walls are real children’s paintings,(3 to 5 years old). There is one door and a large stock cupboard facing the audience.
Voices are heard and keys rattle at the door. The door opens. Kevin, the caretaker, opens the door with some ceremony. He switches on the lights. He is wearing a short brown caretaker’s coat, badges decorate the lapels. Underneath he wears a baggy ‘Damned’ T-shirt , blue jeans, big studded belt and training shoes. A copy of the Sun newspaper is sticking out of one pocket, a plastic container of darts is in his top pocket. His hair is slicked back 1950s American style. He is wearing one long dangling earring. His right hand is bandaged.
Kevin ( as he puts the lights on ) Here we go.
Joyce enters the room. She is middle-class, expensively and conventionally dressed, and is carrying an ‘organiser’ handbag.
Kevin (indicates the room) This do you?
Joyce What is it?
Kevin It’s the creche.
Joyce So why are you showing it to me?
Kevin It’s your room.
Joyce I’m teaching adults and I expect them to be the usual average height. (She picks up a tiny chair with one finger.) Could I see a proper classroom please?
She turns to leave.
Kevin There ain’t one.
Groping for Words was first presented at the Croydon Warehouse Theatre on 10 March 1983.
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